Relationships are never one-size-fits-all. However, there are certain core values that make up a healthy relationship. A healthy relationship embodies trust, clear communication, respect, support, personal boundaries, selflessness, and unconditional love and service.

Ultimately, you are in control of yourself. You can best influence your relationship by how you choose to think, feel, act, and live. How many of the following 33 recommendations are true for YOU in your relationship?

  • You create relationship goals to accomplish together.
  • You plan your days, weeks, and months together.
  • You identify and act on ways to make your partner feel important and admired.
  • You share your honest feelings so your partner does not have to read your mind.
  • You learn how your partner expresses love and prefers to receive it.
  • You share things you are grateful for experiencing each day with your significant other.
  • You spend quality time alone with yourself and encourage your partner to do the same.
  • You understand resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others.
  • You shift your focus from changing your partner to improving yourself.
  • You plan quality time for fun with your partner that goes beyond dinner and a movie.
  • You communicate clearly, specifically, and regularly.
  • You control your temper and understand anger is a terrible problem solver.
  • You discuss finances and set expectations on how to manage money together.
  • You keep physical intimacy alive, and not just behind clothes doors – affectionate touch like holding hands, hugging, kissing—is equally important by boosting the body’s levels of oxytocin, a hormone that influences bonding and attachment.
  • You make sure you disagree fair and respect the other person.
  • You don’t drag old arguments into a conflict.
  • You choose to let petty disagreements pass without conflict.
  • You don’t take out your personal or professional problems on your partner.
  • You understand and work to alleviate your partners emotional triggers and pet peeves.
  • You do not create a controlling environment.
  • You constructively criticize with kindness and respect – and rarely.
  • You appreciate the differences between you and your partner.
  • You learn what it means to keep your ego in check.
  • You never lie.
  • You think about why you love and appreciate your partner.
  • You ask your partner how you can best build their trust.
  • You learn and meet your partner’s core needs.
  • You create core values with your partner and define your purpose together.
  • You create a weekly ritual to check-in with your partner to discuss core values, concerns, stresses, goals, and celebrate success.
  • You specifically define what it means to be patient and kind to your partner – and you take action.
  • You specifically define what it means to love and serve your partner – and you take action.
  • You define how to place God as the foundation of your relationship.
  • You are working to grow into the best version of yourself.

Live The Pursuit of Growth